Wednesday, July 22, 2009

found and lost

Once upon a time, I used to think that I could pen things down, thoughts deep down that cannot be expressed to people. Thoughts that has no meaning. Thoughts that can only exist in a mind lost beyond comprehension and cherishing it.
Sometimes I feel like writing a few lines in this space..But then I read all the nicer creations all around and it makes me feel the need to avoid writing.
I was not this peculiar person always, or well, may be I was odd a little. But not a maniac for being lost, if i make any sense with that sentence. To any practical person, I cannot possibly be someone who is struggling. No one can even imagine what I feel like or how. And at 27, I feel like I have succeeded in one thing, hiding myself. The only real achievement. No one knows me. And also, none have any reason for that either! :D
The world is so over crowded with people, that sometimes it feels like I can't breathe. And the next moment loneliness creeps in. When you know you are alone even while pandal hopping with 10000 people in your city, then you have grown up, or have started getting old...pick one!

It's been long I could sum up courage enough to write down some garbage again! Even blogs need to be fed, that's what I felt. It's been a habit for me to start writing when I don't have much to say and keep from it when I feel like sharing. Good in a way..helps to forget things. Helps, really...
Been an interesting year so far. Away from home, an experience I never thought I can have. And though I am not sure I like it much (being a naturally lazy person!) , I don 't feel that bad, as it creates an illusion, gives a fake purpose, enriches eyes and also passes time. I used to think, how can one wait for so long for....now I know....I also need to wait. Though it's not the best of feelings and it just might break the rest of me in doing so....since time doesn't wait for anyone...but I must wait. I have got nothing better to do at this juncture of my life.


p.s.: please don't mind the poor language. I am loosing it, and this is just a small example of the same. I will perhaps pen down a few more times before..

8 comments:

olive oyl said...

and you are jolly well going to pen down more often. i demand that.

a good post does not need good language but expressive thoughts. since you have both, you are to blog even more often.

i dont know where you've lost yourself, or how you can get back if you have really lost it. but i know that you are a fine person, one of those few who seem like remnants of a past generation, and is so very good (i stole this from a book, it had something like this. but i mean it) and to normal people like me, thats all that matters.

The Secret Keeper said...

ei je
you

blogs need to be fed
and your blog is malnourished

dyang, ya bugger!
this is good stuff

as a last wish
i demand you blog often

hmph

Lost within myself said...

@piggy: thanks..but you praise a little too much :|

@buni: if that's a last wish, then I shall keep it pending so that at least one may stay back to wait..perhaps.i hate the word last re..absolutely hate it.

Ann Dee said...

Ok I felt the same before I let the mare run loose :D

It takes sometime to think-blogging. Till then keep it flowing. You already have three ardent readers. :)

olive oyl said...

i think the time has come for a new post.

workhard said...

Hey ur writing is very honest.. straight.. keep writing...


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Sohini said...

Hey , u think like me .. We are a bunch of loners god knows doing what !!$#$@@
But nice blogs bondhu . Good language is not we look for in a blog . it's what u feel that counts =)
gr8 work . keep writing .

Lost within myself said...

@sohini: language matters. everyone has their share of random feelings on different things, but it's the language that makes them unique.

@Olive: you are correct, I do need to spend a little more time on my blog..even i like it.
but on a sad note, i feel sad when the past generation thingamy comes into mind. i liked the new one more i thought!